How often do you get really excited about an idea or a project, and you hear yourself shouting inside:
“YES!!! Let’s Do This!!”
You get motivated by the possibility, or even inspired to take the first step or two.
Of course you know what that feels like… the unabashed excitement when your heart explodes and something stirs deep inside you…
And then… maybe after those first few steps, you sink into despair, beginning to question whether you can actually pull it off.
Then all the old doubts filter in.
This happens because as a child, somebody told you that you couldn’t do/be/have that… either you weren’t old enough, or good enough, or you didn’t have enough money/time/smarts….
… and you believed them, because they were the people who knew best, right? Your mother or father or teacher or minister/priest or another adult you looked up to…
… and in that little body of yours that believed those people.
When you believed those people, you suddenly became even smaller. Limited. Less than. Your eyes narrowed and your heart closed a little bit. Your soul dimmed its light.
And so, of course, those are the same messages your brain gives you now when you want to step outside your existing preconceived limits of yourself. Because you created a neural groove and a life pattern in childhood around the messages you heard from people you believed, you stop yourself mid-stream from even trying, because in fact you know that you will fail.
Even when you feel that urge to jump up and down and scream out loud that
THIS IS THE THING
that you want to do/be/have in your life… and you KNOW the joy it gives you when you do it….
…but you can’t make yourself go there. Here’s what’s happening:
Your Soul is Saying Yes and Your Ego is Saying No
It doesn’t feel safe, because you still believe all those childhood messages from the people who told you their version of how it really works.
And your adult version of those stories includes: I’m not good enough to do this important work OR I’ll never be able to pull this off OR they’ll reject or abandon me OR I just need a few more skills (or more time to get ready) OR I won’t be able to sustain my family/ commitments/ lifestyle OR (fill in the blank)…
And I’m here to tell you that it just ain’t so.
Here are Three Strategies to overcome those childhood messages when they creep into your adult brain so you can begin to live into your true SuperPowers and bigger impact:
- Create an image and affirmation of the new experience. Listen closely enough to the messages to know exactly what they’re saying. What is the exact wording of the message you’re telling yourself? If you can hear it, you can create a new internal program to revise your belief. Then, create an affirmation around this new program to infiltrate your sneaky brain and reprogram your self-sabotaging behaviors to recreate those neural grooves. The art and science of turning creepy childhood messages into empowering adult responses is polished. We’ve got this (contact me if you want to know more).
- Take tiny steps into the future. Rather than imagining the whole enchilada of the project or idea (that scared your ego into shutting the door), imagine the next tiny small step that will move you into action and out of your frozen stuck state. What’s the smallest most viable step you can take to move the project forward that won’t scare your ego? Some ideas: call a colleague who knows something about your idea, call a friend for support, write a few sentences describing the project, read an article or do an internet search to help you learn about something related to the project, do some creative project (draw, paint, write about) the project to stimulate your senses.
- Clear your mind of clutter. Get out of your own way and clear your mind of egoic thoughts. Some ideas: take a walk in nature, do a visualization about the project’s future, meditate for at least 20 minutes, workout at the gym.
And you’re not alone. Every single one of us has these limiting beliefs about ourselves… and some of us just get more stuck in them than others.
If you’re allowing yourself to remain stuck in those old belief patterns…. you’re giving away not only your dreams, but also your power to have an impact in your life and on the planet.